where are you going to go?

is it true that it is impossible to lie to oneself?switchfoot in their song dare you to move sing,“Where can you run to escape from yourself? Where you gonna go? Where you gonna go?”i don’t know. where does one run to anyway. when all is said and done, in the dead of the night, it […]

so what if the world is ending

for the longest time ever, i have thought of the world ending. i suppose the world started ending for me since my childhood. now, more than a decade later, i see that the world is actually ending in a way and it is not pretty. it is terrifying.i was not aware how much i believed […]

Love and Weights

Ari says that love has always been something heavy for him to carry. i could not agree more. i feel the same. like love can be a heavy thing for me to bear. as a poet once said, love and grief are both nonnegotiable. if they arrive, you have to acknowledge them unless you are […]

A 1000 ways dead

If grief is all the love one has but cannot give, then i have been grieving for a long time. interesting how people think that for grief to occur there has to have taken place a physical death. but no. death is all around in various forms. the way we forget, misplace and lose people, […]

to be jaded…

new month. but not just any month because May is mental health awareness month. i remember writing one of the most vulnerable blog posts ever around a time like this last year. it is ironic that this month, more often than not, finds my mental health in shambles. to be honest i am jaded about […]

TTWBATS Part Two

TTWBATS Part Twoin retrospect, i was incredibly naive to think that was how to deal with what was going on inside but hey, at least i tried. i burned the journals in 2019 because that was the year i was sure i had actually lost my mind. that was the year i thought i had […]

The Things We’ve Been Afraid To Say (Part One)

The things we’ve been afraid to say. #TTWBATSi do not have a substantial clue where to start this post. i was talking with a friend of mine about the saddest book i have ever read which happens to be All the bright places by Niven. so i asked which character he thought i was between […]

The wounded man

Quentin from Paper Towns (John Green) came to the profound revelation that “the only wounded man i can be is me”. i think that we are fundamentally alone in the things that hurt us most. the ones that tear us apart. Theodore Finch from All the Bright Places (Jeniffer Niven) came to the same conclusion […]

how much does God care?

it feels like ages since i wrote. it has been a rollercoaster, this month that is about to end. time is a social construct that only mankind abides by. and it makes us so desperate to live and in the end we really do not even live. just exist. i digress. i have so much […]

Quicksand

I wish this post was on how to survive quicksand, something Theodore Finch from All the bright places would talk about. I mean, he already gave us a list and it pretty much works. This is not about surviving quicksand though. I know a bit of the survival but not enough to write on. What […]